"The ultimate measure of a man (woman) is not where he/she stands in moments of comfort and convenience, but where he/she stands at times of challenge and controversy," Martin Luther King, Jr.
I just read an article printed in Financial Advisor by Robert Laura, "The Dark Side of Retirement", which I think applies even more, perhaps, to being a dementia caregiver. According to Mr. Laura retirement is too often marred by "a hidden epidemic of depression and addiction". The suggested way to address this is to make sure that one still gets the needs of social interaction and friendships, a sense of accomplishment, mental stimulation, the satisfaction of doing something worthwhile, recognition and respect -- that one may have gotten from one's professional work. Being a dementia caregiver may be even more isolating than retirement, and it seems that it would be wise for us to make sure we are getting the above needs met, so that we avoid both depression and addiction. In my own case, I maintain a general sense of optimism, but I also go through periods of discouragement and even despair. This is such a long haul; it is hard to see any light at the end of the tunnel at times. It is important to honor those feelings; we are only humans -- doing a superhuman task. But, we need to be vigilant about not allowing ourselves to be mired down for too long. Today a friend suggested that we trade off having our husbands get together (both have dementia). What a great idea! What creative ways can you think of to give yourself hope and encouragement?
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