Jan 29, 2011

Isolation

"We are here to learn how to swim together in an ocean of love, peace, joy, selflessness, integrity, cooperation, collaboration, in short ----oneness," Michael Bernard Beckwith.

I met yesterday with a woman whose husband has dementia, but for whom she has been unable to get a definitive diagnosis or answer. She spoke of the incredible isolation, the fact that family members were too busy to help, that friends now excluded them because he can no longer play cards or take part in the conversation. This seems to be a very familiar theme for those of us as caregivers for someone with dementia. The friends who drift away in discomfort, the family members who are too busy to help or not so busy to prevent them from trying to impose their opinions, the activities one can no longer due because of the diminishing capacity of the person with dementia. This isolation is a reality for many of us.

But. I want to be sure to notice and be grateful for the love and support I do have. The dear friends who call regularly, our son-in-law who comes once a month overnight to give me respite, the kindness and inclusivity of the exercise group we go to, the family who do include us and reach out and are kind, the neighbor who plows for us. For those I am so grateful.

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