|"You do not suffer, only the person you imagine yourself to be suffers. You cannot suffer."|
The Buddhist teach something similar: that suffering is caused by our attachment to things, outcomes, our own beliefs. To be free from suffering one needs to develop nonattachment -- to have neither attachment toward nor aversion from things and people and events. Take caregiving, can we be impersonal with it? By that I mean can we not take caregiving personally? That does not mean we do not do it with compassion, but it is a different attitude to consider that caregiving just happens in life -- rather than Life has imposed caregiving upon us. Could this disease and caregiving have happened to someone other than you? Of course, but perhaps rather than ask, "why me?", we might want to consider, "who not me?" After all, if terminal disease and caregiving are a part of life, someone has to do it. Why not you and me?