"I will love you no matter what. I will love you if you are stupid, if you slip and fall on your face, if you do the wrong thing, if you make mistakes, if you behave like a human being - I will love you no matter." --Leo Buscaglia
I wonder how many of us have been loved in this way. Far too few, I would guess. It is not that our parents did not do the best they could -- given their skill level, their mental health status, and their options in life. I know my parents did the best they could do -- given their knowledge at the time, but - even with that -- I also know I was not convinced that I was loved no matter what. That is why I remain to this day susceptible to the habit of pleasing others, susceptible to bullying, and susceptible to thinking I can be loved by what I accomplish -- versus who I am. Perhaps you can identify with this. We have to be completely whole in ourselves --- meaning we need to love ourselves unconditionally -- before we can love others unconditionally. And, most of us do not have the foundation of having been loved unconditionally; we have the task of learning how to do that for ourselves. One of the practices we can put in place is to never -- and I mean never -- judge ourselves harshly. We can also practice doing only those things we want to do (versus those we feel we "should"). We can practice taking good care of ourselves: our health, our finances, our time. Together let us learn how to love ourselves -- no matter what.
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