Hope

"Whenever things go monstrously wrong, the first casualty is always hope."  Father Harry Cronin, C.S.C.

Realizing that someone we love has dementia is an occasion when we also realize that things have gone monstrously wrong.  And, when we choose or have forced upon us the role of caregivers, that adds another layer to what has gone monstrously wrong.  What about our own lives?  What about the plans we may have had.  I don't know about the rest of you caregivers, but I feel as if my own life has been put on the shelf for three years.  All my plans, hopes, aspirations, dreams have either been shattered or shelved.  So, how do we get hope back in the picture?  It helps me to believe that there is a divine plan of overall goodness.  On a day-to-day basis I cannot always see the goodness, but I believe that life is inherently good.  I once complained to a friend about not having as much energy as I wanted and that I did not want to develop poor health, and she reminded me that we must all die of something.   Ahh.  So it seems.  And the person for whom you provide care is dying of dementia.  We must make sure we do not also die of it by caregiving ourselves to death.  Hope.  Let us never lose sight of hope.  Let us also not lose sight of our own lives.