Self care

"When we begin to think more about the interdependence of things, we take our place as one more star in a magnificent universe, rather than as the sun around which the universe revolves.  Our heart grows peaceful." Joan Borysenko.

It seems to me that it is a balance between being too self concerned and not enough, and I would venture to guess that most of us providing caregiving lean far too much toward self sacrifice.  The past two weeks have been inordinately stressful for me, with pre-op appointments, operation, and extra care provided to the care receiver.  I was talking with a dear friend who has witnessed and provided care for someone with Lewy Bodies Dementia, and she stressed the need for respite for myself and self care.  I can tell when I am overly wrought because exercise falls out of my schedule, as it has this week.  So, today a neighbor and friend is coming for a couple hours and I will take a long bike ride -- with no worries about his safety and well being.  I also called to schedule a massage in the near future, and I have finally arranged to have home health care services come in.  He is opposed, of course; but I must do it for me.  I have waited too long.  I promised myself that I would not allow this to affect my health nor to bring out the worst in me; and it has been doing both recently.  Please, caregivers, do not delay in getting enough support in place to give you adequate breaks.  And, don't forget that in the U.S. in every state there is a Department of Social Services (called differently in some states) within which is a Department for the Aging.  They are a remarkable resource and have programs that can provide some financial support for respite care, called Caregivers Respite Program.  We can do this only with support which enables us to have some life of our own.   Let us support one another and put in place the support we need.